In the park this morning and I’m slowly getting back to how I was before Rugby. I cannot understand how company makes me feel so low afterwards. Last weekend I felt wonderful and I never saw a single person. This weekend, after barely two days in Rugby, it’s as if the edge has been taken off my feeling of well-being. The weather is the same as last Sunday: beautiful, fresh, cold, clear autumn sun but my feeling of inspiration has been dulled.
I need to look after myself. Keep your energy, Jonny. As I write, the sun glistens off the lake, the wet leaves and the dew on the grass. Blue sky and fresh, fresh air.
I exercised well and did some good stretching this evening. I feel subdued. I have experienced the usual doubts about my future, my health and, I suppose, about my journey. Although the doubts about the journey have not been specific, I have had no enthusiasm about any of it in the way I have had over the last 2-3 weeks. My health worries are related to my script – it’s fighting back, trying to convince me I need to be mothered. Stay calm, you’re doing very, very well.