06.00 E&M. The routine felt very good this morning – hardly any discomfort. As I got out of bed, however, the first thought I had was that I can’t do whatever I have to do today. I was shocked by the automatic nature of this thought and also by the fact that I didn’t even know what the day held for me.
Peter phoned this afternoon. We talked about his trip to Capetown for the filming of his latest TV ad. He is doing really well in his work, has worked very hard over the last six months and fully deserved the three-week trip to what he described as the most beautiful place he has ever visited. When he told me about it I felt the comparisons surfacing: Peter doing extremely well in a job he enjoys, flying round the world… and me…? As soon as they started I stopped them. It felt good to be able to stop the comparisons.
17.00 E&M. The exercises are going very well. Don’t get cocky and be careful. In the past I have become over-enthusiastic when things have been going well and have overdone things. This time I feel much more balanced and in control. After a week of regular and disciplined exercise the feeling of well-being I experienced in November is with me once again. I feel good about myself and about my life, but it is a composed feeling rather than an excited one.